How I would watch him intently as he laid back, closed his eyes and enjoyed stroking himself to thoughts of me. All the while listening to and enjoying my moans of pleasure as I teased and fucked myself to thoughts of him and his love. I recollected about how each time I loved saying I love you and how I wished I could have touched him just to show him how much. No matter how much I try to focus otherwise, that "impossible dream" we had talked about trying to accomplish together creeps into the forefront of my mind and takes over. It stirs so many emotions and makes my body react in ways I wish that would stop, but at the same time in ways, I wish to continue for an eternity. In a sad and sick way, it seems to be driving me. Which, in retrospect, can be viewed as a good thing. It's given me the hope and strength to push harder for that dream regardless of the outcome. A positive amidst all the pain, I suppose, but it has also brought out a recklessness that could only hurt me in the. “Huh?” I said. He raised and arm and I watched as the woman, the woman who used to be my woman, approach. She was alone, no Selena this time.“So, you people set me up?” I said. My tone was not entirely antagonistical, but it could have been, and on another day might yet be.“Well, I will leave the two of you to get to it,” he said. He rose and strode off.The woman sat down across from me, and stared. “You didn’t go off on our son-in-law, so is that a good sign?” she said.“A good sign? Let me say that it isn’t a bad sign which is not the same thing,” I said.“Hmm, yes,” she said. I could see her face was clouding up. She wanted to cry, but was holding back the tears or the moment.“I was out of line talking to you the way I did last week,” I said. “I’d sworn to myself back in the day that I would never do that, but, well, I lost it,” I said.“You were justified, John, I deserved every bit of what you said and felt. I did. I’d apologize but that would be so inadequate that, well, I won’t,”.
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